Newsletter #30

Field 112!

I am calling today's newsletter Field 112 (matrix energetics) because Field 112 is all about true authentic expression and speaking our truth. 

It all began yesterday when I mentioned to Bob that I said "no" to someone's request of me.  Bob was surprised that I said "no" when I happened to have a "legitimate excuse" at the time which might have avoided any discomfort or rejection that person might have felt by my saying "no."  Granted, Bob doesn't know the history at all with this situation, so I said that I preferred to say the REAL truth and not a half truth which is not really in alignment with how I truly feel.  I said "no" in an honest, real, kind, supportive way and to me that is worth GOLD and is exactly what I would want someone to give me.  It is amazing (actually not so amazing) how our society has been programmed and conditioned to avoid speaking our truth, and in fact we (especially women) have been taught to betray ourselves and put other's needs ahead of our own rather than being taught to put ourself FIRST so that we can be our best for ourselves, others and the world.

This reminded me of three things.

I remember over a decade ago when I was talking with someone about how he felt obligated to travel somewhere to fulfill his "duty" even though his heart was not in it. He also had the insight that the other people didn't want him there and that they were doing their duty as well.  He was saying that if both of us, (or really just one of them would have done the trick), could be honest and say what we really wanted -- then both sides could be happy, and to add in my own two cents -- they would also both be living in integrity with themselves.  Gosh -- speaking your mind seems SOOO much easier to me, but sadly it is not for many, and sometimes, it can take people years to truly feel comfortable walking in these "new boots" of speaking their truth and standing up for themselves.

I remember years ago being on the dance floor when I said "no" to dancing with a guy who I have never enjoyed dancing with in the past.  My friend Avan, was shocked and said "I can't believe you did that!!!  I wish I could do that -- how do you do that?"  To me it was SOOO easy to say no because dancing with him is NOT easy nor fun, nor safe for my hands, yet I am totally aware of the fact that 20 yrs ago I never would have been able to do that.  I most likely would have said "sure", been miserable for about 5 minutes as I worried if my musician hands would still work the next day as he was so rough and sadly never listened to my requests to dance with a gentle lead, and then I might have politely said "I am feeling tired, but thanks for the dance."  DANG I am SOOO glad those days are over!  THAT way will never bring me joy on the dance floor, nor is it honoring myself and my hands, AND it will never open up his eyes to making some simple shifts so that others will enjoy dancing with him which could be a HUGE benefit to him (and others).  

Thirdly and most recently I JUST had a private Skype session with someone who is TOTALLY coming into their power in huge ways, and it is so damn sexy to witness this shift!  She actually said "no" to someone who was totally trying to overstep their boundaries.  In the past she would have said yes because she was always concerned with their feelings even though she knew inside that they were crossing a line.  What about HER feelings?  What about her healthy boundaries? What about her sacred time for herself and others?  She TOTALLY is in that space now where she is putting herself first and letting others deal with their feelings or emotional charges on their own, as she now understands that their "stuff" is THEIR responsibility to deal with and not hers, and she is on fire!  It truly puts me on a high to see this shift.

So if speaking your truth and standing up for yourself is challenging, please invite field 112 into your energetic field for more support!  We all deserve to speak the truth AND be safe while doing so.  The world (and your personal life) could change overnight if you choose to walk on a template of speaking your truth!  AND, the more others step into these new empowering boots, the more the collective consciousness shifts towards walking in these new boots as well which serves us all!!!